Open up for the Bird

Next week is American Thanksgiving and it’s probably a good time to start popping those diet pills. My friend and I have already started baking cookies and brownies. I’m sorry to say that whole batches have yet to be placed in the freezer. Who can resist homemade peanut butter blossoms?

Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday- even above Christmas. There are no children to be disappointed because they didn’t get the gift they wanted. No grannies trying to pawn off their makeup of the month collection on unsuspecting granddaughters. No uncomfortable smiling when trying on that handmade sweater. It’s all about the food and family. As long as the potatoes are mashed and the turkey isn’t dry everyone is happy and jolly. Ok, I hate turkey. But I love all the stuff that goes with it, so I can deal.

My mother-in-law always makes a turkey and a ham. Her husband got sick from turkey once and now refuses to even carve it. My sister’s turkey is always a little, um, cardboard-y (honestly it reminds me of that turkey from “Christmas Vacation” or was it “Holiday Vacation”? It’s got Chevy Chase in it anyway). I make a pretty good bird, but no one comes to my house, so I don’t. Hopefully someday I’ll convince the family to join me at my table and they can be wowed and amazed at my abilities.

I never go shopping on Black Friday (the morning after Thanksgiving). I hate the lines and the people in them. These folks hate getting up that early to snag the best deal of the season and they’re not afraid to take their angst out on me. Getting slammed in the thigh 15 times in one morning isn’t really my thing. I would like to introduce these folks to the wonder that is Internet shopping. They get to sleep in. They don’t have to get dressed. And they won’t be forced to use their shopping cart as a weapon. It works out for everyone- except maybe the mail carriers.

I also get time off of school. Just one day- but that’s fine with me. We’ve got exams coming up and papers are due and… it’s extremely nerve wracking. One day off- with a lot of “cider” and some good laughs- is just the thing I need.

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