Fall Arrives
I was sitting outside on our patio furniture watching squirrels harvesting for winter. I’ve been having internet problems all week and haven’t been able to waste time online, so nature got my full attention for a while. It’s been overcast and rainy all week. The leaves are falling. Things are getting chilly. And that little squirrel was focused on the work at hand.
I spent a lot of time like that this week. Outside, in the world, remembering what it’s like to be a part of it. I listened to the sounds of my world, the ones that don’t include YouTube videos or the whirring of cooling fans. I guess it would have been a good time to break open a book and get in some reading. Or maybe practice something from one of my classes. But I didn’t. I just sat back and watched the world and everything in it. Well, at least that which is in my world. It was calming and really helped me focus on what’s important.
But I’m back now. Back to the grind and the research and the learning and the laughing at silly YouTube videos. The internet man came and fixed my issue and all is back to normal in my world. No doubt my world won’t notice my absence as it didn’t notice my sudden participation. The little squirrel will continue to prepare for winter and the leaves will continue to fall and the season premieres will start airing and… Here I’ll be.
It’s nice to have some time off.
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We’re considering selling our house and looking into other areas of the country for living and working. It’s a hard decision for us, but there’s really nothing here and, sadly, doesn’t look like there’s a lot being done by our county to remedy that situation. We’ve thought about moving out West and the only place I can think of that would be even remotely appealing to me is Washington. But I hear it’s pretty rainy there and, considering my lack of skills driving, I’d probably have to find myself a nice Tacoma car accident lawyer. Still, they do have Seattle, which is the the Mecca of coffee shops, so that’s a plus. And "Frasier" was based there. Another plus. Not sure about the indy rock scene, but that could grow on me.
All laughter aside, I don’t know if there’s anywhere in the country where things can be considered "good" as far as the economy is concerned. And my darling husband, God bless him, doesn’t have many marketable skills. Which would leave me to be the breadwinner and that’s pretty much laughable at this point in time. I still have obtained my degree and don’t know if all of my credits will transfer. But what’s the alternative?
I don’t want to uproot my youngest daughter, as she really doesn’t like change. And my oldest daughter and her son (and soon-to-be daughter or son– not yet born) are located here. Would I be able to pack up and leave them? Sure, people have family all over the country with little to no problems, but they’re not me and I’m special. Or something. Both my husband and I have lived other places in the country and we’ve both managed to find our way home eventually. Would this be any different?
These are just some random discussions that are happening at my house right now. I kind of get excited when I look on realtor.com at the different properties in the country, but then I realize we’ll be leaving this property and that’s kind of sad. Am I too old for an adventure? I don’t know. My husband isn’t too keen on the idea, but then he’s happy with his place. When the medical bills really start rolling in things might be different. We need better work and a better way of life. It’s just not happening at home anymore.
This, too, is a side-effect of watching too much "House Hunters". I see these families moving around, trying to find their perfect little nest, and I get all kinds of excited. I’d like that to be us. I’d like to be the one house hunting because we’ve found better work and need to move in a couple of weeks. Wouldn’t that be thrilling? Why, yes, it would be. If I didn’t have the kids I would’ve left a long time ago. Alas, the reality is a bit different than what the television tells us. Another symptom.
I’m not looking for advice, money or sympathy with this post. I’m just trying to get something off my chest. There’s a lot going on in the Flynn home right now and it’s weighing heavily on my mind. There’s some upheaval and uncertainty and a whole lot of hope. The hope part is always front and center when you’re young, but when you get to be our age the uncertainty takes the stage. I wish I could be more adventurous and just do it. Too bad there’s a lot more involved than that.
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